When a journey that began in a pretty wedding chapel winds up in a cold divorce court, the focus is often on the big things like who gets the gold and the summer house. However, child custody is often a big part of divorce, and it involves more than just deciding which children are with which parent on particular days. It also involves helping the children to have as positive of lives as possible, and that includes keeping both parents involved with the children’s school activities.
For example, a child may be in a school play. Of course, their role may simply be Tree #2 or Tomato #7. Still, they want both parents to attend their play, to see them on stage and to be proud of their acting. That means that the parents, who are divorced, will likely see each other at that play.
The key rule for parents who do is to be civil. This should be genuinely being civil as opposed to pretending to be civil because your children and their friends will know the difference. Remember, your children’s happiness matters more than your need to throw shade at your ex. Consider it a valuable character-building exercise in self-discipline.
Bringing a friend to plays and other activities your children have at school will help. It is best if the friend is a platonic one so that your children can enjoy their activities without being beset by a love triangle involving their parents. Having a friend there will give you someone you can talk to, and they can keep you positive.
You should try to attend conferences with teachers with your ex too. However, if that is too difficult, it is acceptable to arrange for separate conferences.
If you find that it is simply not possible to attend these activities and events together, you should speak with your attorney about a custody modification.